Monday, August 17, 2009

DH's latest revelation from ON HIGH

He wrote his new insight into the nature of the universe this morning:

I have a new theory about cats
I have an entirely new theology.
In the beginning, god created the universe. It was, in fact, a revelation of this world from beyond the shadow that he installed to hide us from his presence
There is, however, a personage that evolved from this shadow - the Lord of Chaos
Indeed, this Chaos Lord is responsible for entropy and the nature of the universe ending in a heat death
For the Chaos lord has agents in this universe
In the form of kittens and cats. Cats are indeed sent from the Lord of Chaos to be adorable and irresistable to humans
Yet they are agents of entropy, forces of destruction
For in fact they are responsible for random placement of socks, hair ties, toy mice, and other objects around the house
That we put away previously
This morning's evil deed was hiding my wife's wallet
Right when she needed it
They knocked it down
Knocked it down behind the couch
Much as they were responsible for the downfall of many civilizations
Egypt
Babylon
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